Posted in My Thoughts on Things

Tomorrow – The Procrastinator’s Favorite Word

 

Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow, a word that can be both dangerous and hopeful, depending on how you see and use it.

Tomorrow is the favorite word of the Procrastinator. It is an escape from reality and an escape from responsibility. It is a word that has a magical power because when it is uttered aloud, the problem disappears, or so it seems in our fantasy mind, but in reality it is hidden, among all other clutter which, we also try to ignore.

I must admit, I myself was a Procrastinator for many years, until clutter around the house and around my bedroom had accumulated so much so, that it became unbearable, all because of the “T” word. 

I would say it to myself to appease the hunger for order and organization I had inside of me and promised it, that things will be done “Tomorrow”.

Well, obviously, “Tomorrow” never came. Tomorrow became a few days, then a few weeks and subsequently a few years, until one day I couldn’t handle the mess anymore and swore that I will never use the excuse of “tomorrow” ever again.

But, why do we Procrastinate?

Laziness? Too busy? Could not be bothered? Too tired? Too afraid? Too much clutter to handle? Too overwhelmed? Too hard to do?

All these things are excuses. EXCUSES!!! There I said it, I was making excuses. And this is what procrastinators do, make excuses. We always find a way to move the chores to be done later, always later.

What’s wrong with now? Why are we so scared of NOW? Living in the present, doing things now, organizing things now, confronting things or problems now. Why is that so hard?

Could it be that we are afraid to face our demons. And by demons I mean that big clump of clutter that is in your face all the time every single time you look around the house. It is a much bigger monster than you thought and dealing with it, is just too hard, too difficult, too time consuming therefore we procrastinate and say Tomorrow.

Enough of the fear. Enough of the laziness. Enough of the feeling of overwhelm. Enough of excuses already. Let’s “just do it” as Nike proudly advertises.

Let’s just do it.  Give in to it. 

Clean, organize, scrub, put away things, pay those bills,  make that call, meet that friend for lunch, have that talk with your spouse/ child/ boss/ parent, whomever or whatever you need to face, just face it and you will feel so much better. 

You will feel like a mountain has been lifted from your shoulders. You will feel such a fantastic feeling of relief that you had never felt before. You will have achieved something for the first time in your life. You will have conquered your addiction to the word “tomorrow” and clawed your way out of the bottomless pit of “laziness”.

You will have gained back your power. The power of feeling great after achieving something which you had been dreading and avoiding for a very long time.

Once it is done, you can sit back and relax. 

Now, was that so hard? Don’t you feel better?

Congratulate yourself, you have done tremendous work. This is a beginning of a clutter free, focused and clear future. This is the new and improved you. A “somebody” who gets things done. 

This is the time when you can honestly say, “I’m excited about Tomorrow” because the word will hold a new meaning.  

It will be a more positive and hopeful “Tomorrow”.

 

Copyright © 2018 bedheadleah. All rights reserved. All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.

 

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Posted in Poetry is cool

He Weeps While We Sleep

The noises of the night

keep me awake till dawn

as I fight the demons

rustling noisily in my head

 

Somewhere outside my window

The world continues its insanity

Every lie is known,  every sin is seen

 

Across the Valley,

the dolls are pouting

for daddy did not grant their wish

and their pouting begins in earnest

 

Far across the blue sea

a baby dies in the safety

of its mother’s embrace

Her embrace has turned icy cold

 

The big lady with the giant torch

watches over the city

keeping its shocking secrets underneath her crown

 

Under poorly lit street lamps,

a murder is committed

an innocent life is lost


It is too much to handle,

these problems of the world

Above the blackness of the night,

he watches with sad and weary eyes

As he silently weeps while we sleep


Dawn has broken across the sky

and the light rain washes over the pavement

it gently washes our sins away

and a brand new day awakens

While the cycle begins once more



Copyright © 2018 bedheadleah. All rights reserved. All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.

Posted in Poetry is cool

A Nightmare on Sesame Street

One dark and stormy night

As the Count was taking his nightly flight

He saw Big Bird and Oscar

having a hand to hand fight

 

Big Bird sucker punched Oscar

Oscar skidded down the street

But he got a handful of feathers

before he was knocked off his feet

 

Big Bird kicked all the trash cans

which lined the famous street

This woke the whole neighbourhood

Got everyone on their feet

 

Mr Snuffaluffagus

was first out the door

He ran and was huffing and puffing

he almost fell to the floor

 

Bert and Ernie, came out running

they were wearing matching lingerie

Everyone stared at them as they came out

Now everyone will know, they were gay

 

What is going on here?

The Cookie Monster screamed

“Big Bird and Oscar are fighting”

Elmo said, as he giggled and beamed

 

Then they heard a loud shriek

from further down the street

It was the young girl Nancy

from Nightmare on Elm Street

 

She was running and screaming

as someone scary was chasing her

they saw a set of blades

from the glove of monster, Freddy Krueger

 

He sliced and he diced

the poor adorable muppets

stuffing was everywhere

even on his toasted english crumpets

 

Nancy tried to stop him

As she grabbed hold of his glove

and as she looked into Freddy’s eyes

low and behold, now she was in love

 

Freddy’s grin was from ear to ear

as he planned to transform her

from an innocent teenage sweetheart

to a lethal killing Mrs. Freddy Krueger

 

Copyright © 2018 bedheadleah. All rights reserved. All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.

Posted in My Thoughts on Things

Conformity: Don’t believe the hype

A lone bird sits on a power line, proud and content. Its beak is held high as its face enjoys the sun’s generous rays.  It sits alone while its fellow birds sit together in a straight line,  side by side,  a few feet away. 

What goes through a bird’s mind as it chooses to sit alone? Is it an outsider, a freak, a reject that it had chosen to separate itself from its peers? Are there any repercussions to this act of rebellion?  

Oh hell,  I don’t know,  I just saw a lone bird sitting alone on a power line on my way to work this morning, while her peers were probably gossiping about her a few feet away. 

So, in seeing this rebel bird got me to thinking, is it quite alright to stand out from the crowd. The answer is a clear and concise “indeed”.

It takes a courageous person to defy conformity. Our most celebrated artists, writers, musicians, and great minds were a little different, a little odd, a little eccentric.

Nicola Tesla was referred to as the Mad Scientist.

Vincent Van Gogh was so misunderstood and picked on for being “odd”.

Abraham Lincoln failed in so many things and was teased for looking different, due to his height.

Madonna was seen as too controversial, too sexual, too confronting,  because she dared to act like a man while still remaining very much feminine.

Anna Wintour always defies the norm of the fashion world. She sets her own trends and the rest of the world follows suit.

And of course the great Coco Chanel, who made her own clothes for comfort because she thought the clothes for women at the time were too constricting, and viola a legend is born.

These people defied conformity. They didn’t follow the rules, they made them, despite being judged by their peers. Kudos to them and their boldness.

And why not?  Why be part of the flock when you can stand out. Why follow when you can build your own path?

Stand alone from the crowd. Be different and shine.

Cherish your little idiosyncrasies, your quirkiness, your oddness, this is what makes you interesting. Boring, is the person who blends in, like camouflage, inconspicuous and invisible.

Let your original colours shine. Don’t follow. Stop following. And go your own way, to your own path, which leads to your own greatness. So, be great in your own unique brand of madness.

If you don’t think you can be great, strive to be great anyway.

Greatness begins with someone who dares to be different.

Copyright © 2018 bedheadleah. All rights reserved. All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.

Posted in My Thoughts on Things

BLOCKED: For a year and a bit

No, not that  kind of blockage.  Can you imagine if it were?  OUCH!!!! 

Well, well, well, look who’s back writing and getting inspired.

It took me a year and a bit to get back into the swing of things.

I had been, in the last year and a bit, unfocused and uninspired.  Much of what I had written in my seemingly unplanned hiatus from writing, were poems and half written stories which never saw the light of day or are still hanging dangerously on the edge of the proverbial precipice of unfinished thoughts and stories, hoping they will not fall into the abyss of forgotten ideas.  I had nothing but a few sentences in my arsenal of ideas and then there was……….NOTHING!!!!

Have you ever had this problem? I know I’m not the only one. Lack of inspiration for any writer, is, for lack of a better word, frustrating . 

You have ideas floating around in your head but you can’t quite put them into even a few measly words. The more you push yourself to look at beautiful things to get inspired by, the more inspiration eludes you.

It is impossible to push yourself to be inspired. It’s as if it is taunting you, hiding behind a huge trunk of a tree and peeks its head from time to time when you are not looking. Peek a boo,  where are you, INSPIRATION?

My mistake was that I got into the habit of routine. Routine, unfortunately, sets your brain on autopilot, where day to day activities are set in stone.  

We are basically on autopilot from the get go on Monday morning up until the last minute of work on Friday night. Most of the time, we do not even remember getting to work because we are walking “asleep”. We are continually sleep walking or walking like zombies throughout the working week.

My mistake was that this “humdrumness” extended into my weekends. I woke up and went to bed at the same time, weekend in, weekend out.

I played the same music while I did the cleaning around the house. I ate the same food and watched the same movies over and over again. It was like Groundhog Day, except in my version,  I welcomed it with open arms and snuggly wrapped it around myself like a thick, warm security blanket. Even my thoughts which ran amuck in my head were the same old thoughts. I got comfortable. Too comfortable in fact that I also acquired a few unwanted kilos. I was stuck in a big old RUT. 

When you are in a rut,  everything is blocked. It’s as if you have a security door in front of you and it’s bolted shut, nothing can pass, not even air. You are trapped with recycled air around you and you suffocate. 

Thoughts…… they are dangerous little critters.  Thoughts can be your life long friends or your life long enemies. They can be on your side, urging you on, supporting you on every decision you make, cheering you on like your own personal cheering squad, however, they can also easily turn against you. And my thoughts at the time were not very friendly at all.

Negative, destructive thoughts cloud our judgement,  they blur our focus and play nastily with our emotions. They are sneaky little bastards.

If you let them, they will sneak up on you and the next thing you know, you are hating the innocent middle aged receptionist at work simply because of her face.  There is no rhyme or reason for it, just your stupid thoughts controlling you.

My rut consisted of negative nasty thoughts which may had been there for years. They’d resurfaced and played ball on my field. And they always hit a home run. 

I had to try to refocus my concentration. Even reading a book, which had always come so easily to me, was now a hard task instead of a hobby and past time. The excitement of reading and learning which a book provided, was now a challenge for me. My concentration and focus were in tatters.

So, what was the great, fantastic, stupendously awesome thing which sparked my inspiration again?

Being “uninspired” inspired me to write. Oh, plus, I’d been listening to Queen and Nina Simone and realized how fantastic these artists were. John Coltrane and Miles Davis certainly have fired the fuel of inspiration as well. 

I was inspired once again. So, while the inspiration flowed in my very being, I multiplied it ten fold by bombarding myself with art, paintings, movies which made you think, documentaries, going outside where the wind blew my hair and the Australian sun baked my skin, to a nice golden hue, of course. 

It is amazing what fresh air and sunlight can do to your well being. Your brain can think clearly, your body is less stressed. I was basking in the sun’s rays and a tsunami of inspirational ideas followed.

I did my favorite past time which was sitting for hours in a cafe, writing in my journal while I drank my coffee. 

I watched people, I watched birds, I watched cars go by,  I watched people eat and made a mental note how gross some people are when they eat, but I immersed myself with all these things. I opened myself up to experiencing all my senses once again. And I loved it!!!!

Yes, it felt great to love writing again. My writing juices began flowing, ideas were forming in my head, I just hope it was all worth the two year wait. 

Regardless, I’d been recharged. It feels wonderful to write again. 

So, if you are like me who had been lost in the labyrinth of “uninspiration”, fear not,  it will come back.  

Inspiration will find her way to you. She just needs to be alone with her own thoughts sometimes. And then, she will inspire you once again and you will create new and beautiful ideas which you never thought you had. 

And your pen will once again flow with ideas in your journal, like water flows beautifully and effortlessly down a waterfall.

 

Copyright © 2018 bedheadleah. All rights reserved. All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.

Posted in My Thoughts on Things

Finding Our Purpose

What is our purpose in life?

Surely, many a man or woman have asked this question countless times throughout the centuries. The question comes around or tweaks our attention normally between the ages of 30 and 40 years old.

For some people, the lucky ones that is, they realize the answer to this question at an earlier age. But, no matter, we all ask it at one point in our lives or another . It doesn’t matter when we ask it, but it does matter that we “do” ask it.

Lost is the person who does not ask. And, sadly lost is the person who couldn’t care less about why they exist.

Your purpose could be to write a New York Times best seller, or to help eradicate famine in Africa, or the person who discovers the cure for cancer or the common cold. Or to simply just find peace in your heart thus spreading it around like wildfire.  It could be a many number of things.

I believe that our purpose in life, in its most basic form is to touch as many people’s hearts as humanly possible in the small amount of time we have here on Earth. By spreading the love and kindness across our small part of the world, it will spread through the interactions we have with one another. And with every interaction we have with others, be it positive or negative, it will continue to spread. So, better to spread kindness, love and compassion rather than hate.

The legacy we leave behind are shown through the lives of the people we had touched while we were here.

There is a saying – It doesn’t matter what you say or do, it is how you made people feel that resonates and remains in people’s hearts and minds when you are gone from this world. And it is that which lasts forever.

I have a colleague who will be embarking on a 10 month tour around South East Asia. He’d resigned from his job and will be gallivanting around Asia with only his wits and a friend for company.  Kudos to him for being adventurous enough to do this. He says he wants to find his purpose in life. He will be turning 30 in a couple of months.

I think it is extremely brave to pack up and leave everything to find your purpose. It is quite romantic, in a “searching for self” kind of way.

Exciting is a word that comes to mind as well. He will have the adventure of his life, like Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark only without the hat and whip. I’m sure he will find what he’s searching for in the beautiful beaches of Asia, over mojitos or the local beer, no doubt. Best of luck to you Indy,  I hope you find what you’re searching for.

I too, had wished to do a similar thing a few years ago.  But my chosen destination was a more spiritual one. I’d wanted to go to Patola Palace in Lhasa , Tibet where the Tibetan monks lived. I’d wanted to stay a few months there, to live and learn what made Tibetan monks tick. My intention was to find peace in myself. To quiet the noise,  the stress,  the unnecessary clutter which I carried proudly in my head. I wanted Serenity.

However,  things change in life. Our circumstances change. Plans, dreams and priorities change.

I wanted to go away, and stay with the monks, sit and meditate with them and achieve a higher level of consciousness. But, sadly,  it wasn’t meant to be.

And so, I sulked.

I sulked in cafes, armed with my pen and journal. After a few months of pondering in endless cafes, and drinking too much cafe lattes,  I came to an epiphany.

Over coffee and paper, I’d discovered my purpose. This new found knowing was profoundly enlightening. And I’d found it over a cafe latte in a Sydney city cafe, among others who were probably there for the same reason I was, and finally I’d found peace.

Serenity washed over me with the realization of my new found answer. I became more mindful of my surroundings and the people around me. I became more attuned to people’s feelings. I developed a deeper sense of empathy, much stronger and more powerful than the puny empathy I had before. But most importantly, I found peace in knowing what my purpose was. You can’t be entirely sure of its entirety but it does have a feeling of “being in the right place”. Of belonging,  of knowing that you’re on the right path. Of feeling at peace with who you are and that what you are doing “feels right”.

Our individual purposes differ, as do our paths.  You may have been born to be the Queen of Pop, or to uncover more secrets of the Universe,  or to create technology that makes it a possibility to have a Star Trek kind of future for us all. Or to fight for your right to be educated in a country where girls are considered lower than dogs.

Which ever your purpose may be and however you discover it, know that we all have a purpose in this life.  We are all here for a reason. There is not one life that has no purpose, because all of us, regardless of where we are in our lives right now, have a part to play.

Know that there is a purpose to your existence. Know that you are important. And know that you are, significant.

 

Copyright © 2018 bedheadleah. All rights reserved. All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.

Posted in My Thoughts on Things

The Mullet Phenomenon

It has its own following. It has the word “The” in front of it, suggesting its importance. It is on Wikipedia. It is both famous and infamous. It is the ultimate rebel haircut. It breaks all the rules and all forms of conventionality. It snubs conformity. It is THE MULLET!

In its heyday, it was as big, if not bigger than One Direction and much larger than Kim Kardashian’s behind. Everyone wanted it and almost everyone had it. You were ousted if you didn’t sport the sought after hairstyle.

Hairstylists around the world had their own specialised spins on the original cut. There were curly ones, straight ones, both curly and straight at the same time ones, permed with shaved sides ala Michael Jackson, subtle ones and extreme to the extreme ones. Sure, we laugh at them now, but back in the day, we all had a version of it, even women tried it and liked its versatility. 

As it has been said many times, it is the ultimate haircut, because it had a dual purpose – Business at the front, party at the back.

The Mullet was the “in” thing in the crazy 80’s. It was huge and everybody wanted it. 

You weren’t cool unless you could flip that mullet and let it blow in the wind like Michael Bolton atop a mountain singing How Am I Supposed to Live Without You. Admit it, we were all hooked. Even the most gorgeous of Hollywood’s Sexiest Men sported The Mullet at one point in their lives. And as these following photos will prove, the hair does make or break your face. 

Regardless of how good looking you are, The Mullet will prove otherwise.

Sir Paul McCartney – Even “the Beatle” who could do no wrong, had The Mullet.

George Clooney – Before he became Mr Cool, he was Mr Curly Mullet.

Brad Pitt – Before there was Brangelina, there was Brad-let.

Lionel Ritchie – Hello…..is it my curly mullet you’re looking for?

Michael Jackson – Billie Jean is not my Mullet, she’s just a girl who claims that I am the one.

And for course, there were the crazy mullets which  defied all rhyme and reason, all logic and comprehension.

OMG, it’s the-Sinead-O’Connor mullet!!!

Goodness me, the I-got-it-shaved-mom-but-I-didn’t-have-enough-money mullet!!!

Oh my,  it’s the I-can’t-decide-whether-to-shave-it-or-keep-it-long mullet!!! 

Golly,  it’s the prom mullet!!! 

Oh goodness gracious me, it’s the I’m -the-Batman mullet!!!!

Holy crap, it’s the scare-me-to-death-in-the-middle-of-the-night creepy mullet!!

Eat my shorts,  it’s the Bart Simpson mullet!!! 

Whoa whoa whoa,  it’s the laser-light-show mullet!!! 

Damn…. It’s the puffy poodle mullet!!! 

And then of course,  there was the family portrait mullet phenomenon.

Or the we’re -going-to-the-prom mullet portrait phenomenon.  

Dear Lord, matching mullets and jean jackets, now I’ve seen everything. As Elaine from Seinfeld would say, I am speechless! I am without speech!

Whatever the Mullet was, it was huge, it was a phenomenon, it was The Mullet!!!

Thanks so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed it.

Leah

Copyright © 2015 bedheadleah. All rights reserved.
 All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.

Posted in My Thoughts on Things

What are you searching for? 

What are you searching for?

I saw a poster this morning for a job website. It caught my attention due to the question it asked, “What are you searching for?” in big black bold letters.

Wow, I thought to myself, this was exactly what I was feeling and thinking this very morning as I lost myself in my thoughts. Every single day on the train, I see different posters plastered on the inside of carriages, advertising many different products and events, but I had never seen this one before. Could it be fate, coincidence or kismet that this poster asks me this question on the day that I was actually thinking about it?

Hmmmmm……??? Whichever one it may be, it always amazes me that whenever I needed an answer to a question that I had been pondering, the answer is always shown to me. It is shown to me in the most unexpected places and times. And this morning,  it had presented itself right in front of my face.

It is a simple enough question when asked in passing, however, if you put a lot of thought into it, it is the hardest question you could ever answer in your whole entire life.

Although I consider myself a happy person, with a healthy side of darkness and/or shall I dare say “bitchiness”, over all, when all is said and done, I am truly happy. However, and this is a big “however”, there is still something missing that I can’t quite put my finger on and that nagging feeling is there, brewing like a nice dark cup of Arabica roast coffee.

So, this sign, these five words that hit me straight across my well made up perfect make-up this morning, got me thinking, what are WE all searching for?

It could be as simple as Rosebud, a simple snow slide that Orson Wells’ character in Citizen Cane had cherished and loved as a child. Despite all his fame and fortune this one thing was the only word he uttered on his death bed. A simple snow slide which gave him the most happiness in his life. His one true love.

Do you have a Rosebud? Or is it someone’s affection? Is it fame, fortune, car, perfect house, education, slim body, or in my case, Serenity.

For me, could it be that what I am searching for is Serenity? To achieve total Serenity despite of the chaos that surrounds me? To have complete control of my mind and my emotions, and have complete Serenity despite of all the hoopla and drama Life throws at us? This would be my Everest to climb and conquer. And I am at the bottom, looking up at its grandness.

Sometimes,  I wish I were a Vulcan like Spock (I’m a Trekkie, deal with it), a being ruled by logic and where their emotions are buried so deep, they are considered illogical and a waste of energy.

I know, I’m making it sound simplistic. If it were that simple to obtain Serenity, if it were that simple to go to a store and buy Serenity,  then people would be walking around with smiles on their faces and the word “rage” would not even be a word in our vocabulary. “Yes please, I’ll take a couple of huge packets of Serenity please!” Hahaha,  wouldn’t that be glorious? 

But judging by the events we’ve seen on the news of late,  we have all become so angry, with road rage reaching to an all time high in its ferocity and brazenness that Serenity is a word that may be hard to reach at the present moment.  It is “our” Mount Everest to climb.

Life wasn’t designed to be easy, I’m afraid .  Nothing is that easy or simple. Life is a series of hard knocks and slaps to your face, and most times, the slaps come when you are already down on the ground, trying desperately to get up. 

It is unfair, this thing called Life. But it is designed that way for a reason. It makes us grow and improve and learn from our stupid mistakes, hoping to be better people after a handful of knock backs.

Is it as simple as this – we are born,  we live for a few years and try not to fuck things up,  but of course we do. And then we die, leaving our loved ones distraught and hoping we had saved enough money for our own funeral.

I’d like to think that in this short time we have here on Earth,  we are supposed to connect with people in the deepest level possible.  

To touch as many people’s hearts as possible in our short lives, be it with direct human contact or through chance meetings. Or to make people feel comfortable and safe by just the pure aura you project on other people, and in doing so,  the people we meet in our endless humdrum days are touched somehow.  They may not remember your face but they will remember the warmth they felt around you. And that chance meeting could set a series of acts of kindness and compassion across the world. We just don’t have an iota of understanding how our day to day interaction with others make such an impact.

Imagine this,  you smile at one person on your way to work.  I’m not talking a fake smile here,  but an honest to goodness genuine smile from the heart. Imagine, with that one smile, you changed a stranger’s life by changing their mind about committing suicide that night, by simply showing them a kindness demonstrated with a single genuine smile.

Imagine the impact you made on that one person’s life without even realizing it.

On the other hand, one act of rage to another person can set a series of acts of violence which can culminate into  someone getting hurt or worse. Unfortunately,  it works both ways.

I guess what I’m saying is this, we as humans are connected to each other somehow, as much as we try to dismiss this idea, as much as we try to think “you and me against the world”, we are all brothers and sisters, trying to navigate through this labyrinth called Life. She is a hard task master, she can be mean but also loving,  but she is always teaching us lessons.

I guess the answer to this very deep and soul searching question is for each of us to discover for ourselves. There is not one answer,  it is different for everyone.

Once we do find the answer, a feeling of great relief will wash over us. Surrender will wash over us, as if we were under a waterfall. Our cares will be washed away and we will be reborn,  with a new purpose and a new found knowing, that despite of it all,  what we are searching for, what we are asking for,  the answer to the question we have nagging in our whole being is ultimately found deep in all of us. 

Our job is to open our minds and hearts to be ready to accept the answer to this  question, wherever or whenever it may present itself. 

At the end of the day,  when we are lucky enough to find what we are looking for,  all other nonsense in our lives will somehow fall away.  Once we find what we are looking for,  nothing will matter anymore.  Not that Louis Vuitton bag you’ve been lusting after,  or that car,  that house, that perfect amount of money,  because what we truly desire is not the affairs of the material nature but a deep wanting of something much simpler yet more powerful in the search for our happiness and purpose in our lives. 

So when it decides to come forth, when it decides to knock on your door, ensure that you are ready to open that door and let it in. Invite it to stay, offer it coffee, because if it is what you were truly searching for,  it will stay without much drama and convincing. 

It will come in the most peculiar time and place.

Search no more, look within, it is there,  hiding from us,  just awaiting the time when you have finally asked the right question at the exact right time for you. You already know the answer, it is hidden but it is there. Now, you must ask the right question.

I hope with all my heart that, you dear reader,  find what you are searching for in Life.  You are Indiana Jones searching for the Lost Ark.  Good luck on your search for your truth, and once you find it,  help others find theirs as well. Let us help each other out. Spread the help smoothly, like butter on hot toast.

Good luck my friend.

Copyright © 2018 bedheadleah. All rights reserved. All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.

Posted in My Thoughts on Things

The “So What” Attitude….. 

 

So what…..if people think you’re weird.

So what…..if people think you smile too much or frown too much.

So what…..if people think you’re too old, too young, too Asian, too white, too black, too rich, too poor, too fat, too thin.

SO WHAT!!!

It’s none of their business what you do with your life, as long as you are living within the law of your own moral compass, always following your gut.

Live your life well. Make mistakes and learn from them.

You have a choice to be either happy or sad. Choose to be happy, you have complete power over that.

End the days of worrying what people think of you and how you do things.

Live your life happy. Live your life free from the pressure of their scrutinizing eyes, they are not important, pay no heed to them.

Draw boundaries for yourself and respect the boundaries which others have drawn for you. Do not overstep this invisible line.

Respect yourself, respect others.

Avoid the air of drama which others seem to gravitate toward, it’s toxic, don’t breathe it.

Live your life, you’re only here for a short time, use that time wisely and well.

Be honest. Be kind. Be quirky. Be happy, but most importantly, “BE YOURSELF”.

Our time is short, do not waste it.

The clock is ticking. Tick tock, TICK TOCK.

And so screams the CLOCK.

Copyright © 2018 bedheadleah. All rights reserved. All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.

Posted in My Thoughts on Things

BITCHINESS: The Good, The Bad and The Fugly!!!

BITCHINESS: THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE FUGLY!!!

This is a phenomenon that we are all, sadly, aware of. We may have been a victim of it or we may have been the predator.

Let’s call it by it’s well known and often used title: BITCHINESS.

We shall use the word “bitch” here, as a positive and a tongue-in-cheek term. It erases the negative connotation attached to it and moulds it, into a positive and powerful one. It suggests a woman of substance and with depth to her character, regardless whether she chooses to turn that same character, into a malevolent or a benevolent one.

When women get together, good women that is, they normally support and care for one another. This is called SISTERHOOD. However, this Sisterhood doesn’t always triumph in environments of love and kindness. Most of the time, in situations where women get together, Sisterhood is not felt, rather, it is displayed quite exaggeratedly, through genuine fakeness.

Niceties are replaced with falsities. Some women are champions at this.

Fake smiles, fake compliments , fake kindness are used, to mask the real feelings of envy, jealousy, and dare I say, plain nastiness for the sake of being nasty. And this is when Bitchiness shows its ugly, horrible head.

I read somewhere that, girls compete with each other while women support and encourage one another. This statement explains a whole lot.

Grown women, wise women, mature and confident women support each other because they are confident in who they are, while girls have cat fights or passive aggressive, silent treatment battles.

If a person is happy in their own skin, happy with their life and happy with themselves, then there would be no space in their hearts to carry malice and negativity towards another person.

This is how grown women are. They encourage their fellow women, they support, they give genuine compliments and they lift their sisters up.  This is where Sisterhood thrives and wins. It is the bond of the Sisterhood. However, there is always a downside to everything.

There are “little girls” who disguise themselves as grown women and make trouble out of an otherwise peaceful unity between the sisters, hence, Bitchiness rears its ugly head again.

This brings us to a whole slew of questions that men have asked for centuries. Perhaps even Adam had serious discussions about Eve with God, or with the dreaded snake, depending on how bitchy Eve got.

However, why would we call being Bitchy, bad?

It shouldn’t be, unless you use your bitchiness to hurt others.There are certain times when you do need to get a little bitchy, it’s called “being Assertive”.

However, when women become assertive, it is more often than not, misconstrued as being BITCHY.

This word (bitchy) offends many women, because when women get aggressive, we’re instantaneously called a Bitch, but when men do it, they are seen as being authoritative, powerful, business-like or he’s just being his normal self, he’s simply being a Man.

Double standard??? Hell…..effing YES!!!

Bitchiness, what exactly is it? Is it hormonal, environmental, seasonal, genetic or all of the above?

Women in particular, have experienced Bitchiness, once, twice, a thousand times in their lives; either by being bitchy towards someone or someone being bitchy towards them.

Men should not be overlooked on this topic because most of the time, they are the cause and/or the victims of the big B.

We don’t really know where Bitchiness originated from or why.

But, I have a theory:

Adam was the one who actually took the first bite of the apple. Realising his sin, he then conspired with the Snake (the snake being male, of course), blamed the whole incident on poor, unsuspecting, innocent female, Eve. 

Eve, being the smart woman that she was, discovered the betrayal, didn’t appreciate it and didn’t see the humour in it.

So, she got assertive, then aggressive towards her conniving and supposedly loving”soul mate” hence, the first ever Bitch and the act of Bitchiness were born.

In essense, it was all Adam’s fault.

The three types of Bitches:

THE GOOD:

The Good Bitch is assertive. She knows what she wants, she knows who she is, she knows she is important and to her, she comes first.

She is Numero Uno. She is the Queen in her world and she prides herself in being the best she can be, without much thought about competing with other women. She loves her fellow women and calls them, her sisters.

She is confident enough to know her strengths and humble enough to know her weaknesses. She may look vulnerable and fragile at times but don’t be fooled, she is strong.

The Good Bitch loves her life. She loves her family and friends. But most of all, she is in love with herself (in a healthy way, of course, not conceited at all), so there is no space for her to feel envious of anybody. 

Do not cross her though, because as nice, loving and caring as she is, she will forgive but will never ever forget, if you mess with her. 

She will let you stew in your own concoction of delicious green “envy soup” because she is much too evolved to stoop down to your level of bad girl bitchiness. 

To ignore your conniving and deceitful ways is her style, that’s just how she rolls, she’s just cool like that.

THE BAD:

The Bad Bitch is conniving. She sees you when you’re sleeping, she knows when you’re awake and heaven forbid, she knows when you’ve been bad or worse because she has you in her sights and she thrives when you fail. You have something that she wants, she wants your life.

The little green monster is alive and well in her. Hell, it may even be her conjoined twin, for all we know.

The Bad Bitch is nice, friendly, smiling, accomodating and may even be one of your friends, or worse still, a part of your family, but this face she often uses is just her mask to conceal the big bad green monster within.

Be very careful of what you say and do when she’s around, because she can easily flip stories to her advantage and make you look like the bad guy.

She is the mean girl who is armed with an angelic smile and an insincere compliment, to distract you from her evil manipulating.

Her secret weapons, the ones she will use against you, are your trust, secrets, kindness and compassion. She will flip all that and turn your world upside down.

She is envious of your life and of you. She will copy you and declare to everyone that you are imitating her.

She has the ability to compliment and offend you at the same time and with the same breath, as she deceives with her innocent demeanor, meanwhile stabbing you in the back with a big butcher’s knife.

That’s how she rolls, or rather, that’s how she stabs. She’s very Norman Bates that way.

THE FUGLY:

THE Fugly Bitch is exactly that, the effing ugly bitch. She is ugly through and through. Her soul is Evil.

She is consumed with jealousy, hatred and insecurity that she is incapable of feeling guilty of anything. Remorse is not a word in her vocabulary.

She will do anything, use anyone and make up any story she can, to get what she wants. She loves playing the victim. In her mind, she is the angel and everyone else is evil and out to get her, so obviously, she must get them first. She is extremely paranoid.

She sees herself as the “damsel in distress” who needs to be saved every single time by the people she has successfully manipulated. She does this so she doesn’t have to confront anybody, because she is a coward, the true mark of the Fugly, among other things.

She needs to feel that someone is always there to protect her, although in truth, you are the one who needs protection from this type of Bitch.

The Fugly Bitch is dangerous. She will ruin you, hurt you, or in a worst case scenario, even kill you. She will turn everyone you love against you, if she felt like it, and twist your words to suit the story to her advantage. 

It is a deep hatred of herself that drives the Fugly.

There are past wounds she is still nursing that are so deep, that they may never be healed completely without professional help.

This type of Bitch is deeply disturbed. She may even be a psycopath or a sociopath. Stay the hell away from this type of Bitch.

Run like Forrest Gump if you have to. Run like the wind. Save yourself !!!

In conclusion, to be a  Bitch, the correct type of Bitch, meaning the Good one, is in a way, healthy, so long as you don’t hurt anybody intentionally.

If you were thinking of turning into one, choose to be the Good Bitch.

She is the champion of all the bitches. And to be a Good Bitch is simply to become a strong woman who inspires other women.

Someone who is confident, strong willed and assertive. Someone who has a strict moral code and ethics, that the mere thought of hurting anyone, to get what she wants, is appalling to her. 

The Good Bitch lives in a somewhat Nirvana, a Utopia of perfection, a place she has made for herself, where she is in total harmony with her Womanhood, at peace and comfortable in her own skin and where she knows her value above all else. 

Her power and intelligence derives from knowing her worth, and her wish, is for all her sisters to feel the same way she does. 

To reach this wonderful place is quite achievable. We can do it, anyone can do it. 

All we need to do is, look in the mirror and discover the wonderful women we all are, and that our inner Good Bitch is waiting patiently for us to open ourselves up to the wonder and magic of her. 

Free her (your Good Bitch) from her bondage and give her every opportunity to shine. Let the Good Bitch in you, out. Let her reign in your world.

Let her triumph over the Bad and the Fugly bitches, those bitches are bad news. 

Let her be the beacon of light to all our incredible sisters out there, who are uncertain about themselves and who have yet to discover how amazing, fantastic and timelessly beautiful their Good Bitch truly is. 

One thing is for certain, to be the Good Bitch is to be a good woman, with a heart of gold, intelligence and humility. She is also as sexy as hell, with a body that doesn’t necessarily look like a Supermodel’s, but one that feels it and exudes it, in every single movement, emotion and thought. 

She is beauty personified, because her beauty shines, dazzles, illuminates every bit of her. She glows like a beam of sunshine. 

She is in every single one of us, our mission is to find her. 

So ladies, let us now discover our own Good Bitch, and have fun with her. I am sure that once we’ve found her and freed her, we will never hide her ever again. 

And now I must bid you, Au Revoir….. Bitches!!!

Good luck and happy Good Bitching!!!

Written by: bedheadleah aka Leah: The good girl turned Bitch.

Copyright © 2016 bedheadleah. All rights reserved.
 All written works solely belongs to the writer. Any unauthorized copying, altering or duplicating of any kind without the writer’s permission is strictly prohibited.